I learned another method for good communication today. Chuck Shamel, a friend of the long road, wrote about RESPECTful Communication Guidelines in his report of a recent Vestry Retreat for All Saints Episcopal Church in Corpus Christi, TX. The retreat was led by another friend, Rev. Faith Baldwin. Faith introduced them to a new meaning for RESPECT as a way of listening and responding to one another.
THE SPIRAL OF GROWTH
By Marjorie R. Barlow, Ph.D.
(The examples are compilations from real life, with no reference to specific people. All these “flavors” have been observed over the years. No one person is being revealed, just as no real name is used.)l
THE SPIRAL OF CONSCIOUSNESS
By Marjorie R. Barlow, 2008
These are my notes from a longer version of our growth toward consciousness. I have observed these turnings in thousands of clients over the past 40 years. Most of the people I have met in counseling were in a state of being asleep. By that, I mean their consciousness was still in the stage of belief that all that happened was being caused from the outside. There was little recognition that reality is generated from the inside. So, I invited them to come to some form of awakening through heightened awareness. The spiral moves in ever widening, higher turns. From Asleep all the way to Authenticity, growth was happening and consciousness expanding. I was honored to participate in that process. It was awesome and inspiring to witness.
ASLEEP: A state of ego protection. Persecutor-rescuer-victim roles. Defense mechanisms. Aloneness. Separation. FEAR (dark, negative forboding). Problems solved through control, comply, quit. Need to be right. Belief: Life is created from outside forces. Life is serious. Emotions responding to others behavior. (usually negative like mad or sad or powerless). The “pain body” is real (see Eckart Tolle’s books).
What is employee engagement?
Employees are “engaged” when they:
1. know what is expected of them at work.
2. have the materials and equipment they need to do their work right.
3. have the opportunity to do what they do best every day.
4. receive recognition or praise for doing good work (every seven days).
5. have a supervisor or someone at work who seems to care about them as a person.
6. have someone at work who encourages their development.
7. believe their opinions count at work.
8. believe the mission or purpose of their company makes them feel their job is important.
9. think that their fellow associates or employees are committed to doing quality work.
10. have a best friend at work.
11. have someone who , in the last six months, talks to them about their progress.
12. have opportunities at work to learn and grow.
THEORY U INTEGRATED INTO A STRENGTHS BASED CULTURE
A Strengths Based Culture is a social system that aims at identifying and using the talents of every employee.
Strengths are talents plus skills and knowledge. Individual Strengths are made sustainable when there exists a supportive relationship, target recognition, and realistic expectations. Employees in such a social system will be more likely to be positively engaged.