Here is something to keep your mind busy for a little while. I used this exercise in 2002 and ran across it today, so I wanted to share with you. Enjoy! Take my ideas and create your own ocean and your own ships. I am speaking of relationships with self and others.
When I distributed my Transformation Cards, I was asked by my grandson if I was not honoring negative emotions since the cards were all about getting happy? This writing is to help with that question. The dialogue is open and I invite your feedback.
REVIEWING IMAGO PRINCIPLES, SKILLS, AND PRACTICES
The best method I ever found for my work with families, couples, and all relationships was the one called “Imago” (Latin word for image). The theory was developed by Harville Hendrix and its growth and continuation has been enhanced by his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt. This couple has been transparent over these many years, allowing us to learn and grow from their experience as a committed couple, devoted to healing and evolutionary expansion.
Everything is a Matter of Choice
Between stimulus and response, there is a space.
In that space lies our freedom and our power to choose our response.
In our response lies our growth and our happiness.
I don’t know who said these words and I would like to know so that I could give credit, but these are the most important concepts I have ever learned. The space between the instant something comes into our awareness and the instant we respond is the most important space of all. That is where our power exists. To be able to be aware of what is transpiring in our thoughts-feelings-behavior-memory machine when someone or some thing outside us comes into focus–that is my highest aspiration. If I am aware and I realize that I have a choice in how I respond, I have claimed my power as an authentic human being.
MIRRORING, VALIDATING, EMPATHIZING
In 1988 I read the book, “Getting The Love You Want” by Harville Hendrix. The book inspired me to train with the Imago Institute and became a clinical member of the Imago organization. I held many couples weekend workshops in Corpus Christi, TX. Imago Therapy was the very best I found for my work with couples in my 30 plus years as a marriage and family therapist. The most important part of Imago work was in a process created by Hendrix. He called it the Couples Dialogue. It consists of three parts: