From my long ago journal, copied on April 26, 2005
What’s wrong with using control, dishonesty, entrapment, and manipulation in my relationships? It’s what was done when I was a little thing. I learned it well.
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last….Winston Churchill
A kid hooked on TV is like a motor with high idle and no gears. He can’t engage….Ed Robinson
We believe if we can just keep others happy, they won’t go away and we will be secure and safe. Like converting lambs into alligators.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, even when it never worked in the first place.
When I do my own inner work, there is less that needs my attention.
When we let go of what someone or something SHOULD be, and let it be what it is, we have given a chance for that one or that thing to become what it CAN be.
There is really nothing funnier than to watch the perfect controller make the perfect decision.
A slight shift in perception can create a major shift in a relationship.
Relationship addicts work on remote control. When someone gets remote, they hand the control right over.
Burnout and Body Odor have the same initials.
If you’re not leaning, no one will ever let you down.
When I am in conflict with someone, I can take the path of growth if I see the conflict as a sign that they are bringing me a gift—given because I need exactly what they provoke. Sometimes I am slow writing the thank you note.
Gifts of this sort leads to either greed (expecting some pay back) or guilt (fear of what might happen).
If my giving is done out of fear for what you might do, then it is not a gift. It is guilt.
If my giving is done with payback or scorekeeping in mind, it is not a gift. It is greed.
Self Awareness: “Here are three things that I am aware that I do that make our relationship difficult…………”
They would get a divorce except for the children. Neither one of them wants custody!
Male response to female who wants him to share his feelings: “I feel like I would like to watch TV!”